Marginalia
Bizarre Bazaar
Excerpts from a few of the more remarkable listings on UChicago Marketplace, the University’s version of Craigslist:
Illustration by Matthew Elliott
I’D RATHER NOT KISS A WOOKIE
I am a young, female college student seeking the 21st-century approximation of Han Solo. Serious applicants only, please. If you have to ask anyone about your Han Solo-ness, you are not Han Solo. No Chewies. Meet me in space, you scruffy nerfherder. ;)
FREE: 2 LBS VEGETARIAN FISH FOOD
It seems that my sister’s fish are quite pampered, considering the list of ingredients: apple, broccoli, apricot, green cabbage, mangoes, peas, papaya, red pepper, peach, tomato, pear, zucchini, spinach... plus lots of vitamins and minerals. This is clearly more healthy than what most humans are eating. It also has the Japanese kanji for “saishoku-shugisha” (vegetarian) on the labels. Kind of a cool concept that your young fish need not become carnivores.
SHREDDER $10
A very good shredder, max 6 sheets, it helped me to safely get rid of tons of papers, mails, etc. in my moving process. I’m really grateful to it. Hope it could continue to help someone else.
