Lamentations of the Maroons

There is a website where UChicago students can anonymously submit their everyday aggravations, indignities, and outrages. The editors, unfortunately, have deemed its name not suitable for print publication—but many of the submissions are worth sharing. Here’s a taste.

I was so bored at work today that I decided to memorize all the countries of the world in reverse alphabetical order. I now have a throbbing headache.

Last night I finally spent some quality time with my girlfriend—at the optional epsilon-delta proof lecture.

Tonight, I’m probably not going to get to sleep. Tomorrow, I’m going to be handling chemicals. Last time this happened, a tiny amount in a test tube exploded and ate through part of my notebook and chair.

As if comparing myself to overachieving classmates weren’t enough, I’ve also developed the habit of comparing myself to fictional characters.

Today, I went into a local restaurant and “pulled” a “push” door. The employees laughed and pointed at my UChicago hoodie.